Voila

Photo Courtesy of Shea Magazine

Perfection is a collection false summits and shattered hopes. We spend our life running a never-ending race to flawlessness, the finish line always jumping out of sight whenever it comes into arm's reach. It's a losing battle that we all fight desperately to win.


Coming into winter we have been spending more and more time on roller skis. This means you tend to spend a ton of time relentlessly pounding your technique into perfection. It's a long slow path towards a perfect "voila" moment that every skier fantasizes about. You put in all those hours, all those miles, all those times because you are striving for that paragon you see in the olympics.



There is no paragon in real life. It's a noble goal but it's not realistic.


As a nordic skier, I tend take a big picture look at everything I do. In my mind things are a flow chart like: I am doing this and this and this to work towards this goal, to lead to my great life's ambition. I train hard at practice everyday so that I can do well in races this season and succeed in nordic skiing. That is my mindset. In reality though it's more like: I put up with countless muscle-burning and coughing-up-your-lungs experiences just so...oh right, I can collapse in exhaustion further down the trail than I would have had I not gone through all that misery.


I spent most of this summer's training constantly straining to reach what I thought was the crest of the hill. I kept working hard, going hard, because I thought that when I finally reached the horizon line I'd finally have it all figured out. Maybe I thought somebody was going to shake my hand and say, "perfect, you have absolutely nothing to work on, thanks for all your hard work," and maybe give me a certificate and a stage practiced smile.  I honestly don't know what I was thinking. That's not how it works. That peak of perfection you had your sights set on...? Nice try, that was just the first rung in the ongoing ladder of life.


There was a point in the summer where I just kept sprinting up this mountain in a state of utter exhaustion. The only thing that kept me going was that reassuring idea that sometime soon I would be at the top. One day the person with that figurative certificate would pull me aside. After a while though, all my little summits started to look the same. I started to wonder if I was on a treadmill. Maybe I wasn't progressing at all...


Last week I had one of those days where everything you touch is a disaster. It was a distance day and I was skiing with two of my teammates, so whether they agree completely or not, they can at least vouch for me that my technique/mental stability was at a breaking point. Everything that could possibly be wrong with a person's classic technique was wrong with mine that day. Nothing I did, nothing I fixed, nothing I tried could solve the apparent black hole of technique flaws I was experiencing. I was starting to wonder if I should just stop. Maybe I should just stand completely still, not moving, not touching anything, not making anything worse...because coming to a bitter halt has got to be better that slipping off the back of the treadmill: flailing arms, pitiful scream and everything.

Days Like This (yes that's me)

That was when I had a realization. There is no such thing as perfection. That naive goal, although helpful at times, was pointless and destructive. My older teammates with amazing technique, the professionals I see in the olympics...they haven't reached perfection yet. It's just that from my little false summit they look like they are on top, on perfection. But the truth is there is no top.


I'm not telling you to stop working hard for something because it's a useless battle. In fact it's the opposite. Perfection is, obviously, a good thing to work toward, as long as you realize it's never going to be the result.


So how are you supposed to maintain adequate motivation? Celebrate the little victories in your life. Don't move onto the next false summit until you have enjoyed the one you are on. Take pride in the small things you conquer in everyday life because without it, where are you going to find the time to enjoy a triumph? Throw your hands up in the air and scream with excitement because you surpassed another barrier. Do it because you can. Why save that fun for if you ever reach that perfection, when you can love the podium you are standing on now?


Love,
Victoria